


Realisations

by LMXB



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:48:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23740099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LMXB/pseuds/LMXB
Summary: When something happens to Alex, Kara comes to a realisation and has trouble getting over it.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 37





	Realisations

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Supergirl or the characters. This is written purely for fun.
> 
> A/N: This is set soon after Alex in Wonderland. When I first had this idea a couple of days ago in my head it was a comedy. But as I wrote it turned into something much darker.

"Hey, that's mine." Kara said as Alex took the last potsticker.

"You've had five already." Alex said.

"Bad things will happen if you eat it." Kara countered.

"I can live with you sulking." Alex said eating the potsticker.

"You will so pay for that." Kara said glaring at Alex who just grinned.

"Technically I already have. I bought them." Alex countered.

"That's not funny." Kara said. "I'm just looking forward to tomorrow."

"What happens tomorrow?" Alex asked suspiciously.

"Eliza is back form her conference."

"You are really telling me that the first thing you are going to do when mom gets back is snitch on me?"

"Not snitch. Just tell her how you stole food from my mouth."

"I had one." Alex protested. "You didn't even let Kelly have any."

"Don't bring me into this." Kelly said sitting off to one side watching the exchange.

"See she didn't want one." Kara said.

"That's not what she said." Alex countered as Kara's phone rang.

"I've got to go." She said reading the message. "Let's just hope I have enough energy." She added as Alex threw a cushion at her. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow." Alex said. "Take care."

"I will." Kara said rushing out of her apartment. Once she was gone Alex and Kelly started to tidy up the rubbish.

"Good to see you two are back to normal." Kelly commented as she threw some of the containers away.

"Yeah." Alex said although she didn't sound convinced.

"What's wrong?" Kelly asked picking up on her tone.

"I don't know. It just feels like she's forgiven me a little too easily."

"That's because she knows you were just venting and she loves you." Kelly said.

"I hope so." Alex said looking round the apartment before leaving with Kelly.

-00-

"You okay?" Kelly asked noticing Alex was playing with her food the next morning.

"I'm fine."

"So there's something wrong with the food?"

"No. Sorry."

"What's up?" Kelly pressed.

"My stomach is really painful."

"Why didn't you say something?" Kelly asked moving over to Alex and feeling her forehead.

"It just came on. I probably ate something I shouldn't." Alex replied.

"Kara did warn you that bad things would happen if you hate her last potsticker." Kelly reminded her.

"Please don't talk about food." Alex said miserably.

"You don't seem feverish." Kelly commented. "Can I get you anything?"

"No, I'll be okay."

"Do you want me to call Kara and see if she is sick too?"

"No point. She has the constitution of an ox." Alex said. "I'm just going to shower and get ready."

"Ready for what?"

"Work."

"Don't you think you should take the day off?"

"I can't. I need to do something for J'onn. But I will take it easy."

-00-

As the day went on Alex thought her stomach was feeling better so decided to follow the lead that J'onn had given her. Walking into a garage she called.

"Hi."

"Can I help you?" A man said.

"I'm looking for Clive."

"Don't know any Clive." The man said.

"So the overalls with the name tag Clive are just a coincidence?" Alex asked pointing to the clothes hanging in the corner.

"Looks that way." He confirmed as three men appeared from the back office.

"When you see Clive can you tell him I need to talk to him. It's about his wife." Alex said holding out ha card.

"Wait. I know you." One of the other men said. "You're that DEO chick. You wrecked my car."

"You're mistaken. I don't work for the DEO." Alex said sensing the situation was about to go sideways.

"You're her alright." The man said approaching. "She didn't like an answer I gave and trashed my Mustang. You owe me big time."

"Like I said I don't work for the DEO." Alex said backing away.

"You work for someone." The first man said. "Someone who'd pay for your safe return."

"Someone who knows where I am you dumbass." Alex said, the pain in her stomach not helping her mood. "Are you trying to get arrested?"

"No, but I need to let off some steam." The man who recognised her said as he swung a punch. As Alex went to block it pain radiated through her stomach causing her to mistime the block and instead take a fist to her face.

Dropping to the ground she pressed the button on her watch and hoped she could hold off the advancing gang until Kara got there.

"You sure she is DEO?" Another man asked, surprised with how easy it had been to land a punch.

"I'm sure." The one who recognised her said as he kicked Alex.

Alex tried to ball herself and protect herself as well as she could and hoped when the kicking stopped it was because help had arrived.

When she heard Kara's voice she sagged in relief.

"Alex? Are you okay?" Kara asked dropping by her sister's side.

"Perfect." Alex winced as she stood up.

"What happened?"

"I got jumped." Alex said wincing.

"I can see that. But they're not the type to normally cause you trouble."

"Well I'm having a bad day." Alex said as Kara helped her stand.

"We should get you to hospital."

"I'm fine." Alex said causing Kara to stand back and use her x-ray vision on her.

"None of your bones are broken." Supergirl confirmed.

"Told you." Alex said.

"Come on. Let's get you home."

-00-

"What happened?" Kelly asked as Kara helped Alex into the apartment.

"I was jumped." Alex said miserably.

"What happened to taking it easy?" Kelly asked.

"I was. Technically I barely lifted a finger in the fight. Which is why I look like this." Alex said sitting on the couch as Kelly got an ice pack.

"Why were you meant to be taking it easy?" Kara asked.

"She wasn't feeling well this morning." Kelly said.

"Why didn't you say anything?" Kara asked.

"Because I am fine." Alex said.

"You just got jumped by some thugs. No way would that happen if you were fine." Kara argued.

"Kara. I'm fine." Alex snapped causing Kara to recoil.

"I'll see you tomorrow. Call if you need anything." Kara said walking to the door.

"Kara." Alex called, but the door was already shutting.

"Here." Kelly said handing Alex another ice pack.

"Thanks."

"How's your stomach?"

"Good news is compared to everything else it barely hurts." Alex replied.

"Can I get you anything?"

"Painkillers."

"Are you sure you shouldn't be in hospital?"

"Nothing is broken." Alex said. "Supergirl checked me out."

"Supergirl isn't actually a doctor." Kelly reminded her handing her some pills and water.

"I am." Alex said. "I promise I am okay." She added as she downed the pills.

-00-

"Still not feeling good?" Kelly asked when she entered the kitchen at five in the morning and found Alex sitting there.

"Just sore. I was too uncomfortable in bed. Sorry for waking you."

"It's fine. But I think we should take you to a doctor."

"I'm okay. Today I really am on desk duty anyway." Alex assured her.

"Okay. Well do you want to eat something? Some toast?"

"No. The painkillers have killed my appetite." Alex said as Kelly touched her forehead.

"You're a little warm." She said concerned.

"I'm okay." Alex said. "I'm going to have shower." She added before limping off.

-00-

Having returned for his meeting out of the city J'onn debated going home and sleeping off the last few days. But not wanting to leave Alex to do all the heavy lifting he decided to stop by the agency first and make sure everything was okay.

When J'onn entered the office he saw Alex lying on the floor in the fetal position.

"Alex?" He called rushing to her side.

"Think I need hospital." Alex said clutching her stomach.

Quickly he scooped her up in his arms and flew her to the nearest hospital.

-00-

"What happened?" Kara asked appearing at the hospital two minutes after she got the text from J'onn.

"I don't know. She was lying on the floor covered in bruises."

"More bruises? She was in another fight?"

"Another fight?" J'onn asked.

"She got jumped yesterday." Kara said as a nurse approached J'onn.

"How is she?" J'onn asked

"She is in emergency surgery. As soon as the doctor is done they'll be out to speak to you." The nurse explained.

"Surgery for what?" Kara asked.

"You'll need to wait for the doctor." The nurse said apologetically. "For now, I need to know if she has any allergies."

"None." Kara said.

"Good. Then can you to fill in these forms." She said holding out a clipboard with papers on.

Taking the clipboard Kara looked at J'onn and said. "Eliza."

"I'll go get her. You stay here. We'll be back soon." J'onn said walking away from Kara who sat alone in the waiting area with the clipboard.

Having filled in the forms Kara left them with a nurse before sitting down and trying to use her super hearing to figure out what was wrong with Alex. A plan that was foiled by a new arrival.

"Kara?" Kelly called as she hurried towards her friend.

"Kelly." Kara said opening her eyes.

"How is she?"

"She's in surgery. They won't tell me anything else." Kara said. As Kelly sat down heavily she kicked herself for not forcing Alex to see a doctor. As if sensing her thoughts Kara said.

"This isn't your fault. I'm the one who should have taken her to hospital."

"I could have made her go this morning." Kelly pointed out as they head Kara's name being called. Seeing her foster mother Kara jumped up and hugged Eliza.

-00-

"Danvers?" A man called.

"Here." Eliza said standing.

"And you are?" He asked.

"Her mother."

"Would you like to discuss your daughter's condition in private?"

"No, we are all her family." Eliza said.

"Very well. We had to conduct an emergency appendectomy."

"She's had appendicitis?" Kelly asked.

"Yes. My guess is she would have been showing symptoms for the last couple of days. Did she mention any?"

"Stomach pain and she had a low fever this morning." Kelly said. "We thought it was food poisoning."

"Food poisoning wouldn't cause that much pain." The doctor said. "Fortunately we got to it before it ruptured. Had it ruptured there would have been complications. As it was the surgery was simple and successful. She is in recovery now. All being well she can go home in twenty four to thirty six hours."

"Can we see her?" Eliza asked.

"A nurse will get you when she is in her room." The doctor said walking off.

-00-

As Alex cracked her eyes open she saw Eliza to her side.

"Mom?" She asked confused.

"Sweetie. Thank god. We have been so worried about you." Eliza said squeezing her hand.

"We?" Alex asked confused as she looked round the room and saw Kelly. "Hey." She smiled.

"Hey." Kelly smiled back. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay. Shouldn't I?" Alex asked confused about where she was.

"You had appendicitis." Kelly said. "They had to perform emergency surgery."

"But you are going to be fine." Eliza said as Alex noticed J'onn.

"Hey boss."

"Hi." J'onn smiled.

"I might need the day off." She added.

"You have the week off. And when you return you are on desk duty." J'onn warned.

"You said it was a simple appendectomy." Alex said.

"Simple or not, you need to rest." J'onn warned.

"You've had us all worried." Eliza said.

"I'm okay." Alex said. "And right now I can't feel anything. They definitely gave me the good stuff."

"Why didn't you tell me how much pain you were in?" Kelly asked squeezing Alex's hand.

"Didn't want you to worry." Alex said before noticing Kara standing at the back of the room.

"Hey Kar." Alex said.

"You're an idiot." Kara exclaimed surprising everyone in the room. "You should know better. You are meant to be a doctor. Why didn't you say how sick you were? Why were you picking fights if you had appendicitis? What type of a dummy are you to not be honest about how much pain you were in? What if J'onn hadn't found you? How can such a smart person be so stupid?" Kara asked storming out of the room.

"I'll go." Eliza said chasing after Kara.

"Am I high on drugs or did Kara and Mom just pull a Freaky Friday?" Alex asked.

"I think the answer is yes to both." Kelly said.

-00-

"Eliza? What are you doing here?" Kara asked as she flew through her apartment window several hours later, drenched from the rain. "Has something happened to Alex?"

"Alex is fine. It's you I'm worried about."

"I'm fine." Kara said. "You should be with Alex."

"I'm pretty sure Alex prefers Kelly at her bedside to me." Eliza said before adding in a firm tone. "Go get changed and then we'll talk."

Moments later Kara reappeared in her pyjamas, her hair still wet.

"Are you sure Alex is okay?" Kara asked.

"Alex will be fine. You heard the doctor." Eliza reminded her. "So do you want to talk about why you freaked out?"

"I was just worried about Alex."

"There's more to it than that. Ever since Jeremiah's funeral you have been acting differently. Are you still upset by the argument you and Alex had?"

"No."

"Then what is it?"

"Jeremiah's death just brought it all home." Kara finally said.

"What do you mean?" Eliza asked lost.

"My body works differently from yours. It heals, it doesn't age as fast. You are all going die and I will be all alone again." Kara said, looking as scared, sad and unsure as she had when Clark had first brought her to Midvale.

Not knowing how to comfort her Eliza just pulled her into her arms and hugged her. After a few moments she pulled away and looked at Kara before saying.

"One thing I am sure about is you will never be alone. Your light shines like that of a lighthouse. It will always attract people."

-00-

Eliza woke hearing a knocking on the door. Not wanting to wake Kara, but worried it might be urgent, she carefully lifted Kara's head off her lap and slid off the couch.

"Eliza?" Kara asked confused waking anyway.

"Sorry Sweetie. Someone is at the door." Eliza said.

Using her x-ray vision Kara saw that it was Kelly and started to panic. Putting on her glasses she hurried to the door and asked.

"Is Alex okay?"

"Kara, hey. How did you know it was me?" Kelly replied confused. But when she saw the panic on Kara's face quickly added. "Alex is fine. Well she's worried about you. So she asked me to bring you breakfast." She said holding out a box.

"I'm fine. You should be with Alex." Kara said.

"Kara, if I didn't come here, Alex would have come herself." Kelly pointed out. "And Alex said if you don't eat breakfast she'll come anyway."

-00-

"Did you bring anything from Midvale with you?" Kara asked once Kelly had gone.

"No, we left in a hurry."

"I'll fly you over there so you can pick some stuff up." Kara said.

"You need to rest." Eliza said. "You didn't get much sleep last night."

"I'm fine. And I have had my sugar allowance for the day." She pointed out looking at the empty box Kelly had brought round. "I'll just go shower first." Kara said disappearing to the bathroom leaving Eliza to wonder how she was going to help her daughter.

-00-

Having showered and changed Eliza entered Kara and Alex's bedroom to see Kara sitting on the side of her bed looking at something. Moving over she saw Kara had a box on her lap, a box Eliza had given soon after she had come to Earth. A box where Kara had placed her happiest memories.

As Eliza came and sat at Kara's side Kara shut the box and said.

"Maybe Lena is right. Maybe it is best not to form attachments."

"You don't believe that. And deep down neither does Lena." Eliza said reaching out for the box and asking. "May I?"

Nodding Kara gave the box to Eliza who carefully opened it to find a photograph of her, Jeremiah, Alex and Kara. A photograph she recognised as being taken just before Jeremiah disappeared.

"I think you've not allowed yourself to grieve for Jeremiah." Eliza said. "I think you wanted to be strong for Alex."

"Maybe I have had enough of mourning." Kara said standing and waling to the window. "Maybe I don't want to feel anymore."

"I know you are hurting. But you can't run away from your feelings." Eliza said standing and stepping towards Kara.

"I have run away from everything else, why not my feelings?" Kara asked.

"Because your heart is what makes you you."

"Maybe I don't want to be me anymore." Kara said as her phone buzzed. Taking it out of her pocket she read the message and asked.

"Are you ready? I need to get back to CatCo."

-00-

"How are you feeling?" Eliza asked as she entered Alex's room.

"Bored. Where's Kara?"

"She's gone to work."

"Have I done something to upset her?" Alex asked.

"Not exactly." Eliza said.

"What do you mean not exactly?" Alex asked.

"Can you give us a minute?" Eliza asked Kelly.

"Sure." Kelly said. "I'll be back later." She added kissing Alex goodbye before leaving.

"This is because of what I said to her after dad died isn't it?" Alex guessed.

"No." Eliza said sitting at her bed side.

"So what did I do?"

"You scared her." Eliza said.

"It wasn't exactly intentional." Alex pointed out.

"I know." Eliza said. "I think that was part of the issue."

"I'm lost." Alex said.

"What happened, especially being so close to your father's death, reminded her of how she is going to outlive all of us."

"Oh." Alex said. "That's dark." She added wondering how she could help Kara.

"I've asked J'onn to talk to her. He'll understand more than anyone. For now the best thing you can do is rest and recover."

"I'm lying in a hospital bed." Alex pointed out. "Speaking of rest, are you okay? You look tired."

"It's hard to sleep when both my children are suffering." Eliza confessed.

"I'll be fine so stop worrying about me." Alex said. "Why don't you go get some sleep?"

-00-

"How do you do it?" Kara asked as J'onn walked towards Supergirl on a rooftop.

"Do what?" J'onn asked.

"Live amongst humans, form bonds with them, knowing that they will die so soon? After everything you have lost, how can you bear to lose more?"

"It was you who told me to open my heart." J'onn reminded her.

"I didn't think through what I was saying. I'm sorry." Supergirl said looking out over the city.

"You're right. You can live in isolation. Never form connections. So you never get hurt. I tried that. But that isn't living. And you will still be miserable. You showed me that."

"But loosing people you love, it hurts so much." Kara said.

"I know. And nothing will make it easier or hurt less." J'onn replied. "But that doesn't mean it isn't worth loving in the first place. And no matter how many times you and your sister try to give me heart failure, you're not getting rid of me." J'onn said pulling the caped hero in for a hug.

-00-

"Where's your mom?" Kelly asked coming back into Alex's room.

"Gone to get some sleep. I hope." Alex replied.

"I brought you some real food." Kelly said putting some food in front of Alex.

"Thanks."

"Everything okay with Kara?"

"Not really. I just wish I knew how to help her."

"Following doctor's orders and recovering is a start." Kelly said.

"I'm serious." Alex replied.

"So am I. You gave us all a scare. Especially Kara. She's already lost one family she really doesn't want to lose another."

"How can I assure her I am okay if she won't even visit?" Alex asked.

"Leave that to your mom and me." Kelly said.

-00-

"Kelly? Is Alex okay?" Kara asked as she opened her apartment door.

"She's fine. Well worried about you and annoying her doctor. But other than that she is okay. Your mom is with her."

"That's good." Kara said relaxing.

"Can we talk?" Kelly asked.

"Um sure." Kara said stepping away from the door and letting Kelly in.

"Kara, we've been friends a long time and I'm worried about you."

"I'm fine."

"No you're not. I was there the morning of Jeremiah's funeral. I saw how upset you were by what Alex said."

"She didn't really mean it. She always lashes out when she is drunk and upset."

"I know. And I know you know she didn't mean it, but I still thing what she said changed how you acted that day. I think what she said made you feel guilty for grieving. Almost like if you mourned it would take something away from Alex's grief. And then when we were all in Midvale, you were the one who tried to be strong of Alex and Eliza. I don't know if that was because part of you felt you were never a real part of the family so weren't allowed to grieve or whether or not you were trying to protect and look after Eliza and Alex. My guess is it was a bit of both. And yes that may have helped Eliza and Alex, but if didn't help you. You need to grieve for Jeremiah."

"Have you been talking to Eliza?" Kara asked.

"No, why?" Kelly asked confused.

"She said the same thing. Kind of."

"Well we can't both be wrong." Kelly pointed out. "I know you probably don't want my opinion, but I'm giving it anyway. When you are faced with death of a loved one you realise how fragile life is for you and your family. That is why you freaked out so much in the hospital and why you are avoiding Alex. One way to overcome that fear is to mourn those you have lost. Maybe it is more than Jeremiah, maybe it goes all the way back to your parents. But you can't just box up your feelings if you do it will cost you." She then paused and held out a large bar of chocolate.

"I know you aren't going to change your behaviour just like that, but please think about what I said."

"Why the chocolate?" Kara said taking the bar.

"Sometimes that's the best medicine." Kelly said. "Call me if you want to talk."

-00-

"Can I get you anything?" Kelly asked as she finally got Alex settled back at home the next day.

"I'm fine."

"Do you want me to stay?"

"Kelly, I'm okay. Really. And I promise I will not leave the apartment and I will rest."

"Okay. Your mom will be round later to check on you."

"That isn't necessary. All I'm going to do is sleep."

"Then it won't matter if your mom is here." Kelly argued before kissing Alex goodbye. "Get some rest."

As Alex lay in bed worrying about Kara a thought occurred to her. Carefully getting up she gingerly walked to the kitchen and opened the window before calling.

"You coming in?"

She then stepped back and waited. After a few moments she called.

"Kara!"

A moment later her sister flew through the window.

"How did you know I was out there?"

"Lucky guess." Alex said. "Why didn't you just come in?"

"You are meant to be resting."

"Then why loiter outside the window?"

"To make sure you were okay." Kara said.

"Go get changed." Alex said.

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to have to explain to Kelly why I am hugging Supergirl on the couch."

Nodding Kara quickly changed before sitting next to Alex.

"Sorry to freak you out." Alex said. "But in my defence, you have nearly died just as many times as I have." Alex reminded her.

"I know. But you always have my back, like I have yours. But somethings I can't fight. Human fragility is one of the them."

"You can either sit and worry about the inevitable or you can enjoy life." Alex said. "If you worry about things you can't change you are never going to be happy."

"I know. I'm just scared. I don't want to lose you."

"I'm not going anywhere anytime soon. And when I do go I'll make sure that you are completely sick of me by then." Alex said gently pulling Kara in for a hug.

"Not going to happen." Kara said.

"Even if I ate every last potsticker?" Alex asked.

"You are never eating potstickers again. Or pizza. From now on it is healthy food only."

"What?" Alex asked pulling out of the hug.

"Your health is too important." Kara said. "I'm sure Kelly would agree."

"She eats more chocolate than you do." Alex pointed out.

"I'm scared." Kara confessed. "I don't want to be alone."

"You will never be alone." Alex said squeezing her tightly. "Even if I have to come back and haunt you for eternity, you will not be alone. For the record though, when I do come back and haunt you I will be taking your potstickers."

"Not sure ghosts eat potstickers." Kara said.

"I would. Plus I am pretty sure Slimer would." Alex argued.

"Do you want to watch it?" Kara asked.

"You wouldn't prefer to talk?" Alex asked.

"No. I know you want to help me and I appreciate everything Eliza and Kelly said, but this is something I need to figure out by myself. But J'onn's right as well, I can't stop living to protect myself."

"I didn't really understand any of that." Alex confessed. "But for today we watch Ghostbusters and hug. When you are ready to talk I'm here."

"I know." Kara said altering her position on the couch so she carefully hugged Alex.

**-The End**


End file.
